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i just found out what i really need to have in my life, aside from Jesus that is. a SYSTEM. yes, i am very much in need of order from my room to my schedule to my priorities. it's always so easy for me to change my itinerary because in the first place, i don't have one. then i end up not appearing in the place where i am supposed to be because i am someplace else, someplace where i'm not really needed. hehe. same goes with my priorities. this is the first thing you'll read in most books but it took 3 days and 2 nights for me to learn it. things that an encounter do to you :)

i was head of the food committee for the first time. i was a junior last encounter but my record wasn't so good. i'm not really sure what went in the minds of my leaders but somehow, they gave this task to me. divine intervention maybe. friday night was horrible. there were a lot of things overlooked like packed dinners and dish washing liquid. and people had to go running to and fro the supermarket to go get 'em. the center was jampacked with 107 participants with 7 workers serving them. much to my frustration, many went unfed. can't help but think that if there were more of us, if the place was more organized, they wouldn't have to go through the sessions hungry. no excellence at all! also, because of some misunderstanding, i was made a room guide which was hard because the "room" was somewhere far. okay, it wasn't that far. but the thing is, i had to be back in the center early in the morning which is hard to do when you are someplace else waiting for four girls to finish their routine. i was agitated the whole time i was waiting.saturday morning turned out better. but then that was only because i compromised my other duty as an assistant guide. so discipleship entered. it turned out to be the best thing that happened that day. i was already in the brink of giving up and i already decided that this would be the first and the last time that i would be food comm head and even member. i soooooo don't thrive in moments of pressure. so far, my response in such situations has always been to escape somewhere where there is coffee/cake/yogurt a.k.a. comfort. thank you lord for my discipler! she told me that these things should not make me give up, instead i should learn from them, and most of all, conquer them. pressure handling 101 for someone with pressure allergy.

she also told me that i need a system. that was also what my previous food comm senior was telling me the whole time. actually, it is only now that the full impact of this message has hit me. i heard it then but it got buried in other thoughts.  now that i think about it, yeah, i do need a system in doing things. most of the delays were caused by the stuff which i forgot to buy, by the duties which i did not immediately delegate, by the times when i refused to do anything, and by the things that i overlooked and did not look at. there were resources. i just didn't properly monitor their flow. in real life, these can be paralleled to the way i handle my time, money, people and opportunities. and a lot of if onlys are now popping up.

anyway. dinner came and went. sunday breakfast and finally it was all over. there were still a lot of bloopers which i now charge to experience. but at least i didn't repeat the previous ones. it was all new to me which is good because new things are always good. it means i'm not living a a stagnant life. what i've learned will not stay in the treasure chest. their application will be, as always, properly documented :)